It's a process

This post is potentially quite sad, but it's about something that myself and others in my life have had to deal with a lot recently.

In the past couple of weeks the number of young lives that have been lost or almost lost have been running through my head and conversations with friends. Firstly the massive truck accident in Pinetown Kwa-Zulu Natal where 22 people were killed.  A young woman and former student at Rhodes passed away from leukemia on Thursday and who can forget the lives being lost in war-torn countries like Egypt, Iraq and Syria.

Everyday, every hour, minute, second someone faces loss. With it comes a flurry of emotions, some of which we may never have experienced. Grief, guilt, hatred, sadness, anger, confusion and hopefully, eventually peace.

It seems the older I get the more the death of people my age and the loss of life in general has a profound impact on my life. It is difficult to imagine that people who are at the prime of their lives are dealing with illness like cancer, or parents who are mourning the loss of a child. Maybe it is because I could not imagine being put in that situation myself. How does one come to terms with such loss, how do we move forward.

A discussion I was having about forgiveness has got me thinking about how we deal with such situations. When faced with loss we may want to blame someone, hate something, forget another, but God's gift to us is forgiveness through the ultimate sacrifice. If we cannot forgive others, or simply our circumstances, how can we be forgiven ourselves. Whether you are Christian or not, the act of forgiveness can be just as meaningful. Forgiving is not forgetting, that is an impossible task, it is accepting what happened, letting go of anger and hatred you hold for anything or anyone and working towards peace for your own spirit.

Forgiveness is not a once-off - limited edition - only-while-stocks last product, it is a continuous process and at points we will have to remind ourselves that we have forgiven someone. But it is at these moments that we should call to mind all the great memories of the one we have lost or the blessings that your life is filled with, and remind yourself of what you have in spite of what happened.

Life is too short waste time on blaming, hating, aggravating. I'm not saying that we cannot take our time, believe me we all need to, but do not allow it to consume you, whoever you have lost would not want that and if it isn't someone you lost then don't lose yourself by not forgiving.  

For me its my faith that carries me through. The prayer that God will grant their spirits eternal peace and the faith that he is holding us all up even when we are at our lowest.

Whatever trials and tribulations you may face in life, do not lose the person you are. Allow your self to experience the roller-coaster of emotion and then forgive and find peace, because it is doing that we can start to find joy in our lives again. Do not allow your circumstances to define you, define what you want your circumstances to become.

My word, I'm sorry if this post is a bit over the top, but it's on my mind.